my ex sent me pics of another girl sucking his weiner one time because he thought it would make me mad and i wrote back “did your mom do something different with her hair?”
Realist shit EVER
mIND YOU, HE WAS ONLY LIKE 17 AT THE TIME.
AND MAYBE A DRESS CODE THAT ENCOURAGES MALE RESPONSIBILITY AND LETS GIRLS BE UNASHAMED OF THEIR BODIES AND WEAR WHAT IS COMFORTABLE. Ya know. Just a radical idea.
sex in the shower? no. slip and bust my ass. break my dick. she slippin too. she knock her head on the tile she passed out. bleedin. i cant walk cause my jimmy snapped. thought this was gonna be sexy and we both end up half dead.
The last picture is the face of fear.
kitten wiggles ears while eating
i don’t even care if i reblog this twice a day every single day for the rest of my life
It blows my mind that after all this time you’ve spent on earth, nobody ever bothered to tell you that your eyes aren’t fucking brown.
They are copper against honey and sage and when they water they glow, two perfect orbs the same shade as nature after it rains.
You’re not as simple as they wanted you to be.
"you’re not as simple as they wanted you to be"
boy older than girl
girl older than boy
love is love
If you don’t reblog this every time, I’m judging you.
My fiance is 29 years older than me. So……..THIS.
i dont give a fuck what anyone says
giant age gaps in couples are not cool
this is exactly what the end of the semester feels like
Women, too, have been socialized to believe that the ultimate arbiters of their appearance are men, that anything they do with their appearance is or should be “for men.” That’s why women’s magazines trip over themselves to offer up advice on “what he wants to see you wearing” and “what men think of these current fashion trends” and “wow him with these new hairstyles.” While women can and do judge each other’s appearance harshly, many of us grew up being told by mothers, sisters, and female strangers that we’ll never “get a man” or “keep a man” unless we do X or lose some fat from Y, unless we moisturize//trim/shave/push up/hide/show/”flatter”/paint/dye/exfoliate/pierce/surgically alter this or that.
That’s also why when a woman wears revealing clothes, it’s okay, in our society, to assume that she’s “looking for attention” or that she’s a slut and wants to sleep with a bunch of guys. Because why else would a woman wear revealing clothes if not for the benefit of men and to communicate her sexual availability to them, right? It can’t possibly have anything to do with the fact that it’s hot out or it’s more comfortable or she likes how she looks in it or everything else is in the laundry or she wants to get a tan or maybe she likes women and wants attention from them, not from men?
The result of all this is that many men, even kind and well-meaning men, believe, however subconsciously, that women’s bodies are for them. They are for them to look at, for them to pass judgment on, for them to bless with a compliment if they deign to do so. They are not for women to enjoy, take pride in, love, accept, explore, show off, or hide as they please. They are for men and their pleasure.
Why You Shouldn’t Tell That Random Girl On The Street That She’s Hot » Brute Reason (via brutereason)
Trying to explain this to the boyfriend in regards to the intense eyebrow trend and he is not getting it
Step 1: Acknowledge your gay teammate
Say hello. Say “nice game.” Perhaps give him a compliment on a tackle, or a catch, or a great run. Maybe throw in a high-five or, if that is too uncomfortable for you (it shouldn’t be), give any another indication that you’re happy he’s on your team, even if he plays for a different team off the field.
Step 2: Acknowledge that he’s human
Ask a question about his life. How’s his family? His partner? Talk about shared interests (Yes! You likely have shared interests with this homosexual human!) If you don’t know what this person likes, ask. Or talk about the weather! Or Beyoncé! Not because he’s gay, but because everyone, gay straight, male or female, Madagascan village elders or Inuit whale hunters, has something to say about Beyoncé. She’s the universal conversation starter.
Step 3: Get undressed
Because you just spent two hours playing in the mud and dirt, and it’s a locker room and you’re an adult — and get over yourself and seriously — you have to change out of your uniform. You smell like shit.
Step 4: Realize at this point, you’re looking at your gay teammate more than he’s looking at you
Why is he not looking at you? You’re attractive! You work out! Are you not his type? Maybe he’s only into punters. Oh my God, it’s almost as if your teammate is concentrating on getting cleaned up and getting home to his life, just like you were supposed to be before you got preoccupied with checking him out to see if he’s checking you out.
Step 5: Do your usual stealth glances of other naked teammates
Because straight men size each other up all the time in locker rooms. But it’s from a place of competition, which is far more acceptable for some reason. Bros bein’ bros, etc.
Step 6: Realize at this point, you’re being paid millions of dollars to exist on this team with this gay person, so you’ll survive somehow
At the absolute worst, this teammate finds you attractive and has a moment of weakness and lets one little glance slip that you catch, and you notice because you’re (of course) already staring at him. Now you know how the thousands upon thousands of breasts you’ve stared at slack-jawed in your lifetime feel. Congratulations, Margaret, you’ve just become a woman!
Step 7: Count the number of half-naked teammates around you and divide by 10
That’s how many actually are gay, whether they’ve stated it publicly or not. And they’ve been there all along, since you started playing football in high school, and somehow you’re still alive and unscathed and making millions of dollars.
Step 8: Shower
Because, again, you smell. If your gay teammate is showering at the same time, kudos to you for noticing he walked into the showers. Why are you watching him so closely, anyway? Seriously, are you cruising him?
Step 9: Dress, go home
And play with the piles of money you’ve earned from somehow being brave and manly enough to put on skin-tight capri pants, a jock strap and give other grown men really aggressive hugs and wrestle them to the ground.
|—||How to Behave Around Your Gay Teammate in the Locker Room | John Loos via the Second City Network (via gaywrites)|
Machine washable cumcatcher
The future is now
Why he jackin off while readin? He readin Fifty Shades of Gay?
if someone tells you your clothing style is gay, respond with:
"yeah, it came out of the closet this morning."
If you ever end up on Space Mountain with only 5 people, you have to do the ‘lost in space’